the car wreck

[The scene starts with what looks like the aftermath of a car wreck. Through the rubble a slight movement occurs as JOHN lifts the car door off of him and stands up with a completely content look on his face.]

JERRY

[shouting] OH MY GOD! ARE YOU OKAY?

[JERRY enters through stage R. JOHN looks annoyed at his shouting]

JOHN
Seriously dude? I’m standing like four feet away from you. Do you have to yell?

JERRY
[still nearly yelling] You just got hit by that car! How are you standing?!?!


JOHN
[shrugs shoulders] Uhuh?

JERRY
[voice softer but very quick and panicky] Is there anything I can do for you?

JOHN
A beer would be nice.

JERRY
No [pause] How old are you?

JOHN
18

JERRY
There’s no way I’m getting you a beer. Do you want anything else? A pillow? A wrench?

JOHN
Why would I want a wrench?

[ASHLEY enters from stage L shouting and interrupting JOHN]

ASHLEY
OH MY.. WHAT THE.. WHAT HAPPENED?

JOHN
[annoyed] You too?

JERRY
This man was just hit by that car!

JOHN
[more aggravated] Seriously. What is with all this yelling?

ASHLEY
[worried] My god. Are you okay?!

JOHN
I’d be fine if everyone would just stop screaming.

JERRY
He’s right the worst thing we can do now is panic. I took a lesson on assessing the situation while studying to be an EMT. Lets just wait a moment and take in what just happened. My name is Jerry Streigle what’s your name?

ASHLEY
Oh my god! Are you on fire?!?!

JOHN
Oh that?

JERRY
Oh no! We have to put it out! [JERRY keeps talking as ASHLEY runs off stage searching frantically. Metal clings and chains rattle.] The first rule you learn while studying to be an EMT is to calm any individual involved in the incident… The second is to put out any fires or chemical burns using the precise technique.

JOHN
Oh? What’s that?

JERRY
What’s what?

JOHN
The precise technique.

JERRY
Oh, I don’t know. I’m not a doctor.

JOHN
I thought you said you were an EMT?

JERRY
No [laughing under his breath] I said I studied to be an EMT. I’m a teacher.
[ASHLEY stumbles by covered in garbage stumbling over what looks like a black tube]

JOHN
That’s cool what do you teach?

JERRY
I teach health.

[looking extremely confused]
JOHN
[pause] Shouldn’t you know how to put out the flame then?

JERRY
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Ha ha haaaa!
[ending with a high pitch sigh.]
[JOHN still looks confused and there‘s another pause. This time ending with awkward silence. After a couple seconds JERRY is still smiling and JOHN is looking at his feet, scratching them against each other.]

JERRY
Sooo.. How bout that fire huh? Wow. Bet that burns. [starring at flame]

JOHN
My eyes are up here you know.

JERRY
Well I mean.. We should really be doing something.

JOHN
Yeah, I’m on fire, but who isn’t every now and then.

JERRY
Wait.. Is that a hospital? Lets just go there.

[JERRY points at the nearest building which is not 5 feet away. A light turns on revealing a hospital.]

JOHN
Okay, fine.

[The stage goes dark and a sign saying 20 minutes later is held up. When the lights go back on both JERRY and JOHN are in the exact same place and haven‘t moved.]

JERRY
You think we should g…

[interupting]
JOHN
Yeah. We should probably go now.

[JERRY and JOHN walk to the hospital. JERRY stops in front as JOHN goes in. They make eye contact and wave as JOHN slowly enters walking backweards.]

JERRY
I’ll be waiting for you!

[raising hands as though to say goodbye. Then looking down at feet sadly. JERRY walks to a seat and sits down. The stage slowly goes dark and the same sign is in front again. When the lights finally come on MRS. THOMPSOM is sitting by JERRY. Both look sad and depressed. JERRY is whimpering.]

[entering from hospital]
THE DOCTOR
[very serious tone] I have some good news and some bad news.

MRS. THOMPSON
I could go for some good news.

THE DOCTOR
[excited] I just saved a bunch of money on car insurance by switching to Geico!

JERRY
[sniffling] And the bad news?

[making eye contact with JERRY]
THE DOCTOR
I’m sorry... Your husband is dead Mrs. Thompson.

[JERRY starts bawling uncontrollably as THE DOCTOR turns around and starts walking in.]

MRS. THOMPSON
[complaining] Hey! I’m Mrs. Thompson!

[turning around]
THE DOCTOR
Oh, sorry. Your husband is dead. [continues walking]

[JERRY stops crying and starts to whimper. MRS. THOMPSON is joining him.]

JERRY
Wait! Sir!

THE DOCTOR
[smiling] Yes?

JERRY
What about my friend? The one from the crash?

THE DOCTOR
Oh, he just had a bad case of someone being on fire. The precise technique in putting him out was applied. He’s completely fine and will be joining you out here shortly.

JERRY
Oh? What’s that?

THE DOCTOR
What’s what?

JERRY
The precise technique.

THE DOCTOR
Oh, I don’t know. I’m not a doctor.

[THE DOCTOR walks back inside the building. JERRY’s confusion disappears as he shrugs his shoulders, gets up and begins smiling profoundly. As he becomes over joyous MRS. THOMPSON simultaneously grows louder with her sobs until she is now sobbing immensely.]

JOHN
Jerry?! Is that you?

JERRY
Hey!.. You.

JOHN
My name’s John by the way.

JERRY
John.. [girlish sigh] Hey John! How are you?

JOHN
I’m sorry I was a jerk before. I was just all heated up at the moment.

JERRY
It’s okay. I understand.

[JOHN and JERRY start walking away slowly.]

JOHN
[pause] Jerry?

JERRY
Yes John?

JOHN
Thanks for being a friend.

JERRY
It was my pleasure John.

[as JERRY and JOHN continue walking away, the lights fade slowly. Out of nowhere ASHLEY comes running on stage covered in garbage and torn clothing. The lights become bright again. She appears dirty and is carrying a bucket. ASHLEY runs up to JOHN]

[yelling]
ASHLEY
I got it!

[ASHLEY pours the contaminants of the bucket onto JOHN and the lights go black.]